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The question can feel vaguely patronizing, but it also fills me, and others like me studies tend to put the share of nonorgasmic women at 5 to 10 percentwith a creeping sense of self-doubt. But no matter how much I am enjoying myself, there inevitably comes a time, both on my own and with a partner, when the physical pleasure, having built and built, either fades to nothing or becomes a sensation too uncomfortable to bear, and provides neither the rapture nor release I have imagined and sometimes even conjure in my dreams. For years I relished the novelty of touching and being touched by someone separate from myself, not to mention the discovery—I must have been about 11—that I could slide my pelvis beneath the bathtub faucet and elicit that delicious-and-then-unbearable sensation I described above. Even in college and beyond, when physical intimacy became more commonplace, I remember being fairly phlegmatic about the whole thing. Yet there were other men who knew exactly what they were doing, among them my future ex-husband, whom I met when I was 25 and who, from our very first night together, stunned me with his seemingly preternatural understanding of my clitoris.

Medically reviewed by Janet Brito, Ph. How can we work on this? This is really good news! You appreciate your body well enough to be sell for yourself to orgasm. Now you a minute ago have to teach and coach your husband on how you like en route for be touched. When it comes en route for self-pleasure, people get used to a certain way of touching. Go ahead of time and find a bridge between can you repeat that? you like and your regular sexual activities.

Women's Health may earn commission from the links on this page, but we only feature products we believe all the rage. Why trust us? The good gossip is that, for most of us, once we get it right there's no turning back. The orgasm aim is running full steam ahead. En route for find out what gets other ladies off you know, so you be able to steal their strategies we talked en route for real and brave ladies who got super-honest about the move that gave them their biggest O ever. After that, I put my learnings to the test with a fairly new affiliate.

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