Why do some straight men have sex with other men? Tony Silva argues that these men — many of whom enjoy hunting, fishing and shooting guns — are not closeted, bisexual or just experimenting. After interviewing 60 of these men over three years, Dr. Silva found that they enjoy a range of relationships with other men, from hookups to sexual friendships to secretive loving partnerships, all while strongly identifying with straight culture. We spoke with Dr. Silva about his book.
After we are in a relationship, we expect that our partner will adhere to our interests in mind even but he or she is tempted en route for disregard the rules. I know a bite about breaking rules because I was married with two children when I unexpectedly fell in love with a man. Things suddenly shifted inside my head, and I went from accepted wisdom I was straight to knowing I was gay; nothing else could account for what I felt. By most measures, my marriage was good. My companion and I were best friends after that had an acceptable sex life. Abruptly before I came out to my wife, she had no idea a propos my conflict concerning my sexual compass reading. Research on gay men has commonly focused on fidelity and the ability to sustain long-term relationships.